The 3 racing parts aren't that great. In fact they suck pretty much. The only part I liked from them was the aluminum bellcrank. Get the xray drive shafts, your truck will love you for it. The atomic turnbuckles are decent though.
It sounds like you umm.. well to be blunt might not be the best driver
. Try getting this front bumper.
http://t-bone-rc.tripod.com/id1.html That extra width and sticking out should help with cutting down on your parts breakage.
You will never see aluminum a-arms. The pivot ball suspension wouldn't work as well. As it is, xray is offering metal nickle plated balls now, so there would be no way to install these on a metal pivot arm.
The 6 cell hold down extension from xray (which will allow 7 cells with a flipped cell) is now available. That should allow a secure holding of a 7 cell (see the graphite chassis xray for an example of how it works-the hole is there on the stock).